Monday, January 12, 2009

Ear-ie, Minnesota

I talked to my parents yesterday because, of course, it was Sunday. Sunday means football. Football means Dan has invited a bevy of people over to watch the game, generally without telling me, which means that both the TV, the living room, and my husband are completely occupied for a period of several hours. Yesterday was only slightly different. He told me that he had invited a guy from the paint store over. And that he was making chili.

Came home from work and there was a pot of chili on the stove, and two people in the living room, which evolved into seven people over the next thirty minutes. Good thing that all but one has known us for years, because the first time I went to tinkle, I saw that there were also two loads of laundry on the bathroom floor. Oh well, such is the life of Utter Chaos.

In my great admiration for the pigskin, I went upstairs and started working on Jill's computer, which has gotten a virus that has, thus far, eluded me. While I was waiting for the computer to boot up, I called Mom and Dad. Normal updates on the weather and the kids, and suddenly my mom says "OH! I forgot to tell you. I was talking to your sister yesterday. She said it's twenty below there." My sister lives in that frozen tundra known as northern Minnesota, where every sentence ends with "ohyeahsheryoubetch." I pointed out to Mom that that's not necessarily all that cold there, and she said "yes, but when I was talking to her the other day, she went and let the cat in. A mninute later she told me 'oh my gosh' her ear just fell off!" A minute later, she said that the other ear was falling off too.

What the heck? I don't know how long it takes for a cat's ears to freeze solid, but apparently not all that long, in Ear-ie, Minnesota.

Me being me, I asked Mom if she had fried them up and eaten them. Maybe with some fava beans and a fine chianti. Maybe they'd taste like potato chips. Nothing says lovin' like a nubbin in the oven. And if a cat loses its ears, does it still do that ear licking thing that they do, like when they are declawed and they still keep clawing on the sides of boxes and such? I mean, it can't impair their hearing any, since cats don't listen anyway. But it would cause seriously problems with wearing these cool cateye glasses, from KarmaRox, on etsy. Guess now she'll be blind, too.


Karma Sexton said...

OMG...hahahahaaaaaaaa....what a hilarious story! Thanks for including my cat-eyes!

What-I-Found said...

OMG! The cats ears really just fell off? Really?
I am speechless.

Anonymous said...

Oh, lord! Her EAR fell off?! I can't help an involuntary chuckle, in spite of myself, but truly, I'm horrified! We have a herd of deer regularly crossing our driveway (we live in far northern Wisconsin) and one has no ears. I thought she might have been born without ears, but DH always contended they probably fell off after a severe case of frostbite. It seems he may be right! We must be crazy to live here.
The cateyes look a lot like my first pair of glasses - 1965, 2nd grade. Mine were a fetching shade of purple, though. As I recall, I only had two frames to choose from - and I was the ONLY girl in my grade with glasses :( Hated them then - but now I wish I'd kept them.
Thanks for a fun blog!