The dog gets it all

So, Thomas went backpacking this week.  It was his first overnight journey, after months of taking Penny The Stalker Dog out on lots of day hikes. He's been chomping at the bit for warm weather since Christmas, when I got him a lightweight backpacking tent and warm socks (hey, I'm the mom.  Gotta keep those tootsies warm).  We finally got some nice warmer temperatures, so off to the trail he went.  There was rain in the forecast, but he carefully planned to outrun the rain.

He was thoughtful enough to file an itinerary with me, but I still asked when I should be concerned, if he didn't get back.  He said he was planning to be on the road by 2pm, but if I didn't see him by evening, get worried.  And for the record, I wasn't worried.  The Heir to the Throne is a planner.  He had researched everything, and he went prepared.

He texted me about 5pm and told me he had broken camp for the night, that Penny was having a blast, and everything was fine.  It was nice to know that it was going as well as he had hoped.

Then, about 10pm, Seth comes into my room and asked where Thomas was.  I reminded him that he was backpacking.  He thought about it for a minute, then said "you know what I just realized?  At this very minute, my brother could be getting eaten by a bear."  "SETH!  How could you even think such a thing?"  "Well, it's possible," he says.

I threw him out of my room, saying "geez, boy, right about the time I was thinking of putting you back into the will, you go and say something like that!"  He replied "well, Mom, if I'm cut out of the will and Thomas is dead, then that means Jill gets everything, and she wants you dead."

At which point, I told him the dog gets everything.