The trophy wife

In June, we will celebrate 20 years of wedded bliss. 20 years. That's a long time. My parents have been married more than 50 -- and that is a REALLY long time.

Hubby and I got talking about mortality one time. I told him that, should he meet his maker before me, I would never get married again. "You can't say that" he said. "Oh yes, I surely can," I replied. He thought that was nuts. I told him that it was nothing against him, but I was done being married once the "till death do us part" part showed up.

"You mean to tell me that you would never have sex again," says he (proving, yet again, what is #1 to a man). "I didn't ever say THAT," I retorted. "I'll find me someone whose 22 and grateful, and goes home at night." Hubby just shook his head in dismay.

So he said to me "well then, I'm not getting married again either." "Oh, no way," I said, "you have to be remarried before the papers are all signed." He insisted no way, but I told him, no way could he handle Utter Chaos alone, and he'd have to be remarried -- quickly -- and I gave him a list of potential candidates. And told him that the dd would have to approve of whoever he chose, or I wouldn't be the only one in hell.

Years later, most of the girls on the list have moved on, gotten married or are otherwise occupied, but I still believe in planning, so here -- grab up this Busty Black Vintage 50s Femme Fatale Dress, from polyesters, on ebay. It's what all the trophy wives wear.