Saturday, April 12, 2008

Things that make you go thump

So, my college kid came home this weekend. Was gonna catch a ride with the track team, but there wasn't room on the bus. Tried to get me to go get him, so he didn't have to ride with "the most boring guy on the planet." Wow. I'm not the most boring person on the planet. But, my asthma intervened after a lot of cleaning, so he ended up with Boring Guy, who dropped him off at Gray's Cafeteria. Walked in with his roommate's big bag 'o laundry and his backpack.
Cause that's how college boys roll.

So, he tells me that the roommate, and maybe another guy, are coming for the night, after they get done with the track meet. Okey dokey. Our house may not always be particularly clean, but you're welcome to come by anytime. And teenaged boys are amusing. So, ds18 goes to pick up the roomie, and comes home with THREE teenaged guys. Oye. Had to do some scrambling to get the guest (aka dog's) room set up, take down the tent in ds's room, that was constructed of two twin mattresses, and figure out where everyone was gonna hang.

I go upstairs, and there is ds18, on his laptop, next to his buddy Clint, who, amazingly, is sober for once, then ds13, and dd. The three of them are playing on the Wii, and ds18 is sitting there, trying to figure out his wireless connection. Roomie is on the futon, talking to his woman on his cell phone, and extra guy is on dd's computer.

I ask ds, "do you know where they (waving arm around the room) are all sleeping?" He shrugs and says "I think that a couple are sleeping downstairs, and the Clint is sleeping in here." DD, without looking up from the game, says "no, we have it all arranged. They're sleeping in my room."

Mother almost passes out. Brother's jaw drops. Buddy's eyes bug out of his head, and he just starts emphatically shaking his head no no no. I swoon and say "WHAT?" DD replies, without looking at me, but with a fair amount of frustration, "we already figured it out. You don't have to worry about it. They're coming in my room."

DS is now cracking up, and I am lightheaded. DD finally looks up with her gorgeous blue eyes and says "what?" Clint, who has knocked himself out of the game in fear, says "no, I'm sleeping in here" cause he's getting the fish eye from the mother of the house. DS13, eternally blonde, says "I don't get the big deal."

Oy and vay.

An hour later, dd comes downstairs and asks what the heck she said that was so funny. I have regained my senses now, and explain the complexity of trying to explain to her father, the plan of having half of the Vincennes University track team spend the night in her room, and how he may never recover from the shock. The big blue eyes are round as saucers when she realized her faux pas, then the attitude comes in and she says, like only a teenaged girl can say, "Mooooooom. That is disgusting."

And walks away. They all end up going to bed early, and the only person in the wrong bed is our big dog Timmy, who climbed in HIS bed -- with two 6 foot 3 track guys, who, amazingly, moved over and made room. If you knew my dog, you'd know why. To know him is to love him, even if you're a straight dude sharing a bed with another straight dude, in some weird people's house. Cause if you are here, you just roll with whatever happens.

Unless someone wants to go near the dd. THEN they have to deal with the father, and the two brothers whilst stepping over the mother's limp body on the floor. But alas, the days of dating are coming fast and furious, the boys came back tonight, minus one, and now are out trolling for women at a volleyball tournament. The Age of Innocence is rapidly disappearing.

So here's to my babies, who aren't such babies anymore, but who will answer to Baby till my dying day. With the exception of the Bratty Gurl, who will be known as that forever. And to celebrate their baby-ness, here's a great Dan Folgelberg shirt, from Kix Designs T-Shirts Memorabilia, on the bay. RIP Dan Fogelberg and long live the college boys.

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